Yesterday is still today

Today (yesterday) I am grateful for the camaraderie amongst colleagues that comes from working alongside some the most awesome people in the world. If you don't laugh, you cry. Venting prevents explosion. All emergency services workers seem to know this and there is an instantaneous closeness that comes from working in the pointy end of life in all its glory, and gory. Thank you for sharing all your tips, tricks and wisdom with me - not just for the job but for life as well. The collective consciousness of some very smart cookies is right there and being shared freely between us.

Privileged to be a part of it. Working with my people. Until all hours of the morning.

(I would sing you the song of my people, but it would have too many swear words in it)

The candle of thought

Sitting on a beach after midnight, a stranger plays the guitar and the first word grabs you by the limbic system. The song you used to sing in retrospect, wise beyond your 14 years, every night locked in your room, from a CD that cool guy at school gave you (and if only you were 'in' like him, he could have been your friend). You've been rehearsing for this your whole life. The candle of thought lights up your face. You suddenly remember, yes, before this I was in a band. For two seconds, I was the lead singer in a band, and I forgot. That was seventeen years ago, and the memory of gigs at golf clubs and school halls faded away, through that thick oppressive fog that's been like cobwebs all around you. The Indian Ocean embraces your legs and the Fremantle Doctor caresses you as it whips around you cleanly, blowing everything away. The white sand of the Western Australian shore beneath you, the Southern Cross above you, and all those years behind you. You are held in place so now you are free. An amazing individual in an ordinary lifeline and an extraordinary world. The song returns into your life, and you are finally yourself again, it's a new feeling, a new year. You sing, and you know all the words, and now you know what they mean. A duet with a stranger on the beach amongst friends, some that you have met and some that you will never know.

Today I am grateful for my voice, and all the years of music inside of me that is now resonating with the earth and the people that surround me. I am grateful for the depth of my memories, they can ring out clear as song, as all this fog is lifting. Love to all for a beautiful year. Be grateful, be alive.

A whole year of thanks

I moved here to recover, and now I can say that I truly I have.

I have achieved so many things in my life and career despite being under the weather at the start of the year.
I have seen so many things despite having been in tears at times.
I have fallen in love, true and proper, and I can be grateful for that even though he could not stay with me. He was sent to remind me of my beauty, grace and goodness, and I really do appreciate it now.
The depth of emotions I have owned this year and all the colours that I know I am capable of feeling are coming back to me now.
I am strong.
I am free now to live and be the best me that I can be.

My family have reminded me of where I come from, and give me the strongest foundation of freedom to know where I am going. They have shown me how to be real people, because they are.
My friends are beautiful, beautiful people, wherever they may be, no matter how high or low each place has been we have ridden the rollercoaster together safe in the knowledge of the deep bonds of friendship.
My dog has found me and nurtured me in her canine way and her spotty socks.
My travels have brought me to the conclusion there is so much more to see.
My two hometowns have grounded me and re-charged my weary feet.
The ocean has explained a thing or two. The river is sleeping but it is always there for me.

I wish for enough.
I hope for real. Real life. Real love.
I aim to be me.

May you find what you are looking for this 2014.


...and today I am grateful for Triple J, driving my car with the windows down, hearing the black cockatoos and the sense of pride I feel to be from here and still somehow belonging everywhere I go.

and today, of course

I am grateful for the beauty of Wagyl dreaming, and the slow drive around the Swan River, and the gentleman's agreement that if you see a speed camera, you will flash your lights so your fellow man doesn't get pinged meandering by. The Wagyl has been sleeping, but I know that he is there. If I have an important question, it will be answered. Just not today. All my questions have been resolved, or are not yet important. Nothing is as big as the universe. Except patience.

Oh yes, and Ribena. I am very grateful for Ribena, thank you.

All my arms and legs

Yesterday, I was out walking my dog. I've been in a lot of pain. I was thinking, there must be something I am grateful for today. Something? Anything? It came to me.

1. I have all my arms and legs
2. They are long and lean and that is aesthetically pleasing and preferred in our current society
3. Like me, they are capable of great strength, great tenderness and general everyday abilities.

They have been injured very badly this year, twice, doing things that I love and make me happy. They caused a lot of pain and fear but they have healed, just like my heart soon will be.

Thank you, I have all my arms and legs.

Fade into gratitude

I am grateful for all those times alone in the dark dark night, when I am free. Free to cry, and laugh, and smile at the universe, and offer up my voice as a gift of gratitude that I am free to be me. Even if I am alone, I am always me.

Little talks

Today, I am grateful for almost-rhymes and catchy tunes with uplifting horn sections Once, I used to love you, and a song that reminded me of a place called home, inside your arms. Until you took the house and carried it away to house a more deserving wanderer than I. Now that song just gives me the shits and reminds me how I hate your face. Lucky there is this song which is even happier and better without you! Plus the lyrics are less cheesy and I don't have to sing your name. Trickier to memorise, though. Life is great! So grateful, time.